Hi,
EDITED FOR PRIVACY
Is there something I can say or do,that Chinese understand to really show how much I love them.
J********
Sorry for the delay. But I'm going to be consistent as I am useless at relationships. Asking TCG is like asking me to perform brain surgery with a chainsaw. I also don't buy into manipulation (I feel that it is evil) and or tricks into getting people back either.
Unfortunately I don't have any constructive advice as I have said a few times Chinese people men and women are men and women first Chinese second. Therefore I don't really think there is anything to say or do which will change her mind and save the situation in the manner which you want. Since what will work with one woman may not work with another, but as said I do not like manipulation either.
TCG has been in a similar situation once. Whereby she phoned me up and told me she was going home goodbye... I was a stupid kid and made a grand gesture to win her back I took a shockingly expensive flight out landed less than 13 hours after the phone call. And I saw the other person... not nice.... In hindsight I could see she was saving my feelings by saying going home as in I've met somebody else. Much as other Chinese people will save face by telling outright lies but will reveal their actual feelings via their body language.
If anything if she is still around then I would ask in plain blunt terms her friends and or close family as to what the issues are and to see if they can be reconciled or not. As said women can be terrifically indirect and hint things. Add a dose of China with conservative values, body language reading and many of the reasons for the separation can be completely hidden from normal view.
EDITED FOR PRIVACY
Is there something I can say or do,that Chinese understand to really show how much I love them.
J********
Sorry for the delay. But I'm going to be consistent as I am useless at relationships. Asking TCG is like asking me to perform brain surgery with a chainsaw. I also don't buy into manipulation (I feel that it is evil) and or tricks into getting people back either.
Unfortunately I don't have any constructive advice as I have said a few times Chinese people men and women are men and women first Chinese second. Therefore I don't really think there is anything to say or do which will change her mind and save the situation in the manner which you want. Since what will work with one woman may not work with another, but as said I do not like manipulation either.
TCG has been in a similar situation once. Whereby she phoned me up and told me she was going home goodbye... I was a stupid kid and made a grand gesture to win her back I took a shockingly expensive flight out landed less than 13 hours after the phone call. And I saw the other person... not nice.... In hindsight I could see she was saving my feelings by saying going home as in I've met somebody else. Much as other Chinese people will save face by telling outright lies but will reveal their actual feelings via their body language.
If anything if she is still around then I would ask in plain blunt terms her friends and or close family as to what the issues are and to see if they can be reconciled or not. As said women can be terrifically indirect and hint things. Add a dose of China with conservative values, body language reading and many of the reasons for the separation can be completely hidden from normal view.
I can not read body language at all. I find myself yelling at my husband during fights "I am not a mind reader!" but the real problem I have no BSP, Body Sensory Perception. In other words I take no hints, damn men with their innuendos and subtle hinting. I communicate like a sledge hammer.
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